Childless Elderwomen

Watch the recording of the #NomoCrones who gathered together on the last Full Moon of 2020 for 90-mins of truth-telling wisdom, laughter and fireside tales to close the year. Hosted by Jody Day, Founder of Gateway Women.

  • JODY DAY (UK/Ireland) is 56 and is the Founder of Gateway Women, the global friendship & support network for childless women. She is a psychotherapist and the author of ‘Living the Life Unexpected: How to Find Hope, Meaning and a Fulfilling Future Without Children’.
  • MARIA HILL (US) is in her early 70s and is the founder of Sensitive Evolution and a leader/coach in the field of HSP experience and growth. She is a long-time member and volunteer moderator of Gateway Women’s private online community.
  • KAREN MALONE WRIGHT (US) is 65 and the founder of The NotMom, the site for women ‘childless by choice or by chance’ and The NotMom Summit. She now co-hosts ‘The NotMom Conversation‘ on YouTube.
  • KATE KAUFMANN (US) is in her late 60s and the author of “Do You Have Kids? Life When the Answer Is No”. Kate’s blog for Psychology Today, “Unapparent,” explores the lives and issues faced by the childless and childfree. She is childless due to failed infertility treatments and single after divorce.
  • DONNA WARD (AUS) is in her mid-60s and is the author of 2020’s ‘She I Dare Not Name: A Spinster’s Meditations on Life’ as well as a being an essayist, editor, publisher, classicist and former psychotherapist.
  • SUE FAGALDE LICK (US) is in her mid-60s and is the author of the memoir & blog ‘Childless by Marriage’ and most recently ‘Love or Children: When You Can’t Have Both’, as well as novels, journalism & poetry. A musician and singer, she is widowed and single.
  • JACKIE SHANNON HOLLIS (US) is in her 60s and is the author of “This Particular Happiness: A Childless Love Story” about her journey to making peace within her marriage to a man who chose not to have children.

To hear about future #NomoCrone webinars when they are announced, click here.


Extract from Jody’s interview with The Age Buster, 20th November 2020

“Aging is a dynamic process, like every other stage of life. We tend to view it as a decline, because we’re focused on the physical part only, bypassing the emotional, psychological and spiritual levels. Perhaps this has something to do with our culture’s hyperfocus on ‘surfaces’, on image and reflections. I know that the six-months I spent travelling in rural India in my late twenties, during which time I hardly saw a mirror or reflective surface, had a huge impact on me. I turned within and experienced myself as a living being with a rich internal life that felt like the true locus of my identity, once separated from my reflection. And that was before social media and smartphones and everyone photographing themselves all the time… As a culture too, we’re also deeply uncomfortable with anything we don’t have control over. Fertility and aging are very linked in that way, and many childless women, whether they’ve had fertility treatments or not, are given no support by others for ‘accepting’ their childlessness – the cultural narrative is one of ‘don’t give up hope’, and that everything can be ‘fixed’ with more money, more time, more science or a better attitude. And so it is with aging – it’s seen as some kind of moral defeat, especially for women, one that they should have tried harder to fight. But the last time I checked, the most positive attitude in the world was still no match for the natural entropy of the universe!

What this ‘surface’ approach to aging misses is that aging is the movement of energy to another part of our experience, to our interiority. That there’s a richness to be found in aging, if approached consciously, just as there is with the grief process. I think the key factor for me here is embracing aging as a conscious process, as a threshold. There are parts of the physical side of it that are already a challenge for me, so I’m not going to brightside it, but having cherished the gifts that arose from the dark night of the soul of my childlessness, I’m prepared to stay open to what treasures my aging soul may yet have in store for me. I’m only 56, the adventure is just beginning for me, and I’m excited to understand what it takes to become a conscious childless elderwoman, and to share what I learn with other childless women. Because there’s nothing out there written about it for us as far I can find – every book I’ve so far read about female aging or ageism, whether it’s depth psychology or pop psychology (with the notable exception of Joy Loverde’s practical guide) presumes that every older woman has had children, and that most have (or have had) a life partner. So we can add singlism to the ‘ism’ list too!”

Read the full interview on ‘The Age Buster’ here.


Watch a recording of the first gathering of Nomo Crones in September 2020 for World Childless Week 2020

To watch, click the video image above or this link.
To find out more about the ‘Ageing Without Children’ themed day of World Childless Week, click here