ONLINE COMMUNITY

Welcome to your Tribe

Support for the hard stuff; enthusiasm for the good stuff

Whether you’re still hopeful of becoming a mother, ready to ‘move on’ and get going with your ‘Plan B’ or flip-flopping wildly in the middle (and it varies from day to day!) you’ve found the right place.

The Gateway Women Private Online Community is a very active, compassionate, safe and non-judgmental community. We have members from English-speaking countries from all over the world so it’s active round round the clock.  It’s not on Facebook and all members are ID-checked before joining so it’s as safe as we can make it. That makes it feel very different from any other social media space you might have experienced.

I was in the depths of despair and thinking I was the only woman going through this pain before I discovered Jody and the Gateway Women community. I’m not a big social media person but this Community has transformed things. Being a member has really helped me turn my life around to cope with childlessness and look forward to the future. (GM)
I came across Jody and the Gateway community 2 years ago. At that time I was deep in my grief -although I didn’t realise it was grief then. When I started to read the posts from other women I felt a warmth and understanding. It truly helped me to come to terms with being childless through circumstance, gave me strength, my feelings of self worth and purpose started to return. I know that it was a major turning point for me and since then I’ve gone on to connect with a number of Gateway Women nearby which has been invaluable. It’s so supportive, compassionate and empowering to be part of this community; I really feel my sisters, my tribe, walking with me when I have bad times and celebrating with me in the good times. (Debbie)
I’ve made a few really close girlfriends from Gateway Women; women who I have much more in common with than just a lack of children. I don’t do much social media these days as I can’t stand the fakeness and posturing. but I check GW everyday. It’s a very real yet very positive forum and I’m glad to be part of it. (Rosie)
Sudden relief deep within is what I experienced the first time I posted to the Gateway Women Community. It was also a realisation that I wasn’t going mad. I had thought that for quite a long time. The sensitivity, the respect, the intelligence and the compassion started my healing path. I no longer feel so alone. There is light out there, and always someone to talk to. ‘My Tribe’ is the best way I can describe how I feel about it. (Cathy)  

SCROLL TO THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE TO READ MORE COMMENTS AND TESTIMONIALS FROM MEMBERS

AFTER YOUR FREE ONE-MONTH TRIAL, MEMBERSHIP COSTS £60 GBP PER ANNUM / £7 GBP PER MONTH. FREE MEMBERSHIPS ARE AVAILABLE AT THE END OF THE TRIAL PERIOD FOR THOSE WHO NEED THEM, OR AT ANY TIME DURING MEMBERSHIP IF YOU ARE STRUGGLING FINANCIALLY.

CLICK HERE TO APPLY FOR YOUR FREE ONE-MONTH TRIAL MEMBERSHIP
need help with it? community@gateway-women.com

Even if you’re not really an ‘online forum’ kind of person, this is something you don’t want to miss out on:

  • Finally connect with other women you ‘get’ your situation, whatever it may be…
  • Comment on the stuff in the media that drives you nuts
  • Share tips and wisdom on topics relevant to childless women of all ages
  • Get support round the difficult family and relationship dynamics we have to deal with as the ‘childless’ ones
  • Make jokes and be honest and understood rather than be seen as ‘weird’ or ‘bitter’
  • Take the heat off your intimate relationships and friendships by finally having somewhere to safely offload about your situation!
  • Make new friendships with other childless women in your part of the world and organise live meetups with each other when/if you’re ready
  • Join or set up one of the many local member-organised events such as book clubs, walking groups, Plan B Support Groups, art groups, etc.
  • Make alternative plans for difficult days like Mother’s Day, Christmas, etc
  • Get support for all the changes that creating a Plan B entails such as perhaps retraining for a new career, standing up for yourself at work, dealing with other people’s opinions (and comments) etc.

CLICK HERE TO APPLY FOR YOUR FREE ONE-MONTH TRIAL MEMBERSHIP
If you have any questions or problems joining, do email Helen at community@gateway-women.com and she’ll help you through. No problem is too ‘silly’ to ask her, honest!

30 Comments on ONLINE COMMUNITY

  1. I am excited about joining the online community as I have been struggling lately, and recently threw in the towel on online-dating after yet another dating debacle involving “elevator shoe man” and, before that “porn man”. If it wasn’t terribly sad it would be funny. At just shy of 38, my time is running out, as is my patience, optimism, and zest for living. Watching Jody give her insipiring talks on Ted and at various other venues has been a God send these past few days. Thank you Jody!

  2. It is really good that there is a community like this one for women like me who are childless and is struggling to come to terms at not having children at my age. As I got older I am struggling at the thought that my husband and I do not have children. I have developed depression as a result. It is very awkward going to family functions where everyone else has kids and not us. The worst part is that I am turning 50 next year and the thought of it is making me sick to the stomach. All my friends have kids and we feel the odd ones out. I hate feeling this way. We are in the process of trying do egg donation treatment, anticipating going to South Africa but I don’t have high hopes. Egg donation process is extremely difficult here in Australia and not much better overseas. People make it sound easy. I live with regret each day that we didn’t do anything about it years ago. This is the reason I am wanting to make friendships with women like myself in my situation. I am from Melbourne, Australia and I am wanting to meeting other women like myself going to the following meet-ups.

    • Hi Sandra – connecting with others via the Gateway Women Melbourne Group sounds like a great plan. I’m going to be in Melbourne to run a workshop in early 2018 (all still in planning, so no dates yet) and perhaps we’ll meet then. Good luck with the egg donation – indeed, none of these procedures are ‘easy’… Hugs, Jody x

      • Jody: I’m glad you do this for women, and I’m so glad there’s a place for support and recognition. I’m Brad. I wanted to be a father, but my time has passed and I have a rough time dealing with that, especially today, on father’s day. I want to make it clear, I didn’t research, maybe there’s groups out there, I don’t know. I have depression, and today is a tough day to do much of anything. Just FYI, We’re out here too. God bless and thanks.

    • Hi Sandra
      I fully understand where you are coming from..
      My husband and I are childless as will and it has to be one of the most difficult feelings that I face from day to day…
      I turned 50 in February and my family had a family get together for me to help me celebrate but needless to say I had to try my utmost hardest to look & ack happy but inside I was tearing apart simply because I had reached the milestone of turning 50 and knowing I am childless & this is the way that my life is going to be 😢
      I have wanted a child since the night I became a wife… because it goes together.
      I told my husband that I never dreamed in a million years that we were going to be a childless couple & it would be just the two of us on family…
      I understand whee you are coming from girl ….
      Hugs

  3. I hope I’m in the right place. I’m suffering from depression and it all stems from not being able to have the one thing I’ve dreamt of for years…being a mother. I just want to find some relief and acceptance to not being a mother and hopefully realize I can still live my life somehow with out being a mother. Thank you for listening.

  4. i am so grateful and feel so relieved t hear others’ stories what are so similar to mine, the complexity of the threads of life that can leave one childless and how seldom it is that most people, well meaning, understand or know what to say. My heart is full!

  5. GW has helped me to face the hard truth that I won’t be a Mum, a fact that I wasn’t wanting to acknowledge until an unexpected event forced me to. Joining the community has given me support and a safe place to express my feelings, especially the ones that others might not understand. Now, when something happens in life around childlessness, I know there is a place and people to turn to who know and who understand and sometimes that alone is enough to reduce its impact. I would say, if you’re wondering if GW is for you, give it a try – you won’t know unless you do. There are so many women out there in our situation but, unlike mothers, we don’t always know. Don’t struggle in silence …. you have a community to turn to.

  6. I’m writing this post on holiday having an amazing time. A few years ago I was in the grip of childlessness grief. It was overwhelming and much as though friends and family wanted to help, they didn’t know how.

    I honestly don’t think I would be so happy and content were it not for Gateway Women. The forum has been the only safe space I had to grieve without judgment and let rip with the pain and frustration of longing for a child but not being able to have one.

    No one will judge your darkest moments and a group of fab virtual friends will cheer you on through the small steps that get through that grief tunnel.

    And it’s there 24/7. When your colleague unexpectedly brings her baby to work and you’re privately in bits and need some support, you’ll get it.

  7. Hey! If, like me (and loads of others!) you feel or have felt an inexplicable grief inside your heart because the stork never personally visited you then you are in the right place! On this forum you will find there are lots of other women who have exactly the same thoughts, emotions you thought you were the only person having! It’s true! There is lots of understanding and no-one will just say “Get over it!”because it just ain’t that simple! It’s a tough journey and you do need a little help along the way. This is definitely the place to start!

  8. Would it be overstating matters to write that Gateway saved my life? I don’t think so. I stumbled across it by chance at the end of 2013 completely broken by my childlessness. In three years I have learnt what it is to do your grief work, how self-compassion is a daily practice and I have risen phoenix like from the ashes of my previous life. And I couldn’t have done any of it without my tribe of Gateway women.

  9. This community has meant so much to me in the past few years as I’ve been struggling with the grief of childlessness, and all of the complicated emotions which come along with that. It is such a comfort to know that I’m not alone – there are so many women out there who really ‘get it’, and who are so generous in offering support when it is needed. If you’re feeling isolated and misunderstood and struggling with pain and other feelings, this is the place for you. Every time you reach out in pain to this community, you will be heard, and held and supported. It helps more than I can say.

  10. Finding the Gateway Women Community after years of feeling like I was the only one struggling to embrace an entirely different life than what I wanted and envisioned changed me permanently. Knowing that I wasn’t alone, reading the posts of open, interesting and loving women and attending the first ‘Reignite Weekend. workshop in the US this past July have been critical pieces to my ongoing healing process. I can’t think Jody enough for creating this community and for leading and developing the Reignite workshop. I’ve been able to reflect on past feelings and experiences of isolation and despair through a new lens since finding GW. I still am working through the grief and loss at the age of 50 and I I am also able to enjoy much of my life. GW is truly a blessing in my life.

  11. I really can’t tell you how much it meant to me to come across the Gateway Women Community. Following a melt down at 40 where I withdrew from life, family & friends I didn’t see the point in living. Following years of not finding a connection anywhere,in desperation I typed Help I’m childless into the search engine. And up popped Gateway Women. To read that I wasn’t alone and that there were other ladies out there having similar thoughts and feelings to my own, felt a relief but also strange. At first I was scared but I knew my life had to change so I took the plunge and once I had completed the questionnaire it was a huge release. I had previously come across so many negative websites saying “how selfish I was” or “how a career was obviously of more importance” etc, etc. My friends had all been lucky enough to have children and I felt excluded from their lives as I had nothing in common with them anymore. I couldn’t share their happiness, or understand the excitement of their child’s first word, their first tooth, day of school etc and I just felt bitter when they complained. I was lost and isolated – they really didn’t understand how lucky they were. The voice inside my head took over and silenced any reasoning, shutting down my existence. I had tremendous feelings of inadequacy when I compared myself to them, feelings of not being feminine, etc, etc. GW has allowed me to make new friends that I can confide in and share my feelings. On top of that I have experienced ‘laughter’ again and managed to do fun things that I previously felt I didn’t deserve. Ladies if you are scared, please don’t be. You have found help and healing here and I hope you will feel as safe as I do being part of this community. Welcome, Sam xxx

  12. GW is an amazing community of fantastic women. It is positive and modern. It gives you access to new friendships and a place where encouragement and support are given for growth and a place of understanding when you’re feeling really cr*p. I feel validated by amazing women who are like me and truly ‘get’ it and inspired/ helped by new writers/ insights who help me work through my mixed emotions and grief to recover and truly connect again with life and people and build a fulfiling joyful meaningful life. xxxxx

  13. I was in the depths of despair and thinking I was the only woman going through this pain before I discovered Jody and the Gateway Women community. I’m not a big social media person but this Community has transformed things. Being a member has really helped me turn my life around to cope with childlessness and look forward to the future.

    I’d encourage any woman wondering whether this is worth joining to do so. You are not alone and things really can get better.

  14. I came across Jody and the Gateway community 2 years ago. At that time I was deep in my grief -although I didn’t realise it was grief then.
    When I started to read the posts from other women i felt a warmth and understanding.
    It truly helped me to come to terms with being childless through circumstance, gave me strength, my feelings of self worth and purpose started to return.
    I know that it was a major turning point for me and since then I’ve gone on to connect with a number of gateway women nearby which has been invaluable.
    Its so supportive, compassionate, empowering to be part of the community, I really feel my sisters, my tribe walking with me when I have bad times and celebrating with be the good times

  15. I’ve made a few really close girlfriends from gateway women, women who I have much more in common with than just a lack of children. I don’t do much social media these days as I can’t stand the fakeness and posturing but I check GW on google+ everyday. It’s a very real yet very positive forum and I’m glad to be pat of it.

  16. Sudden relief deep within is what I experienced the first time I posted to the Gateway Women Community. It was also a realisation that I wasn’t going mad. I had thought that for quite a long time. The sensitivity, the respect, the intelligence and the compassion started my healing path. I no longer feel so alone. There is light out there, and always someone to talk to. ‘My Tribe’ is the best way I can describe how I feel about it.

  17. Being someone who considers myself pretty self-reflective/aware and able to share feelings, I was surprised to discover how bottled up my feelings about being childless by circumstance were until I had a place to express them. The private, closed Gateway community feels completely safe because I know know that nobody from the rest of my life can see what I post. It has emboldened me to open up and actually post (which is unusual for me when it comes to social media). And in posting my thoughts, feelings, experiences within this group, I have felt so heard and it has provided such relief. The internal pressure of holding all that in has dissipated. Hearing others’ experiences and perspectives as well as the shared inspiration is helping me move through my grief. I know that the other community members “get” me without me having to explain in detail my circumstances. So grateful to not feel so alone and to have a group of people to cheer my on in my Plan B.

  18. Gateway women provides a wonderful, safe, supportive space. I can be myself and connect with other like-minded women who really, truly understand where I’m coming from. No judgement here, just support, inspiration and heartfelt understanding. Priceless.

  19. Gateway Women has been a blessing for me, as a quite isolated 50-something woman without a partner or children. In the few months since I’ve been able to join, I have felt my self-esteem rise. It is a community where I do really feel connected, more than any other online community I am a part of.

  20. At 48 yrs last year, I joined this online GW community after realizing I needed to connect with other women who understand firsthand the struggles of being childless by circumstance, not choice. After registering, I spent the first few weeks reading the many posts…that alone was like a light went off – finally, the stories and feelings of other women in my shoes that I could relate to. My feelings of isolation and loneliness lifted a bit. Then, after posting – the immediate and warm support expressed by others in this GW community made me feel part of a ‘gathering of women’ again. While I don’t post a lot, there is the comfort of knowing that on any day, at any time, in any mood, you can log in and see the conversations of women who share your experience and get support and understanding. This community, the conversations and the resources offered within are a real source of strength while experiencing / moving through the grief around not being a mom, and beyond. I fully recommend registering – this online community is a lifesaver and I will be forever grateful to Jody and my GW sisters:)

  21. I would encourage any woman struggling with childlessness to join the Gateway Women community. It is a unique community where feelings are not only validated but understood like nowhere else. It is in this community that I have learned that I am not alone in this journey. I never expected my journey to be one without children but knowing that others struggle with all of the same feelings I have makes me realize that these feelings really are okay. There are other women that feel just as lost, sad and confused with where they are right now as I do. There are women that offer encouragement that things can get better. Most importantly the community is united just to be there for each other no matter where we are individually in that moment. You will receive kind words when feeling down. You will receive an equal amount of encouragement and genuine happiness when things go well for you, whatever that might be. Don’t hesitate to join if you really need some support from others that truly do understand.

  22. Since I joined Gateway I haven’t felt alone any more. People here understand where I’m coming from, they understand my pain and isolation – and I understand theirs. We support each other, and it’s amazing.

  23. I’m not usually a social media person but I’m so glad I signed up to Gateway Women: it has been a lifeline over the past few years. I’ve made wonderful new friends who really understand the journey I’m on, being childless by circumstance and not by choice. I really cherish being part of the Gateway community and would heartily recommend it to others.

  24. Gateway is a unique community for women grieving childlessness because it offers understanding, acceptance, validation, encouragement and a path from the despair and isolation of a painful socially unsanctioned loss to a new life with new joys. Gateway helps women travel the path from a conventional life to one that supports the uniqueness of each person. It is a special community of brave and wonderful women. I highly recommend it.

What's your experience?

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