How do I find a counsellor, therapist or coach to help me with my childlessness?
‘Childless Coaching’ is tangible, goal-oriented, short-term support to help you move towards some aspect of your ‘Plan B’. I know personally and can recommend the following coaches:
- Butterfly and Beyond (UK): https://www.butterflyandbeyond.com/
Personal coach and yoga teacher Sophia Andeh offers weekend yoga retreats, online coaching, and private yoga classes in Oxford and online for childless not by choice women.
- Your Childless Heart (US) https://www.yourchildlessheart.com/
Laurie Spellmeyer is a licenced social worker. Involuntarily childless herself, she offers coaching specifically for childless women looking to move forward with their lives in tangible ways.
You can download my guide to finding a therapist or counsellor (including some individuals I can recommend) here
- You might want your prospective therapist/counsellor if they have experience with childlessness-related grief as many of us have found that therapists are not immune to the same unconscious prejudices as the rest of society. Read and share/discuss this article (for therapists) with your therapist/potential therapist and see if they are suitably receptive to the issues: 10 Things You Need to Know About Involuntary Childlessness
- If you’re in the UK, you can find a therapist/counsellor near you via the UKCP or BACP.
- In the UK you could also try Wellbeing’s ‘Find A Therapist’ questionnaire designed to help you identify the therapeutic approach that may work best for you. http://welldoing.org/find-a-therapist/
- If you have experienced infertility, you may like to find someone via the BICA website (British Infertility Counselling Association). They are aware of the work of Gateway Women and I have spoken at their events.
- In the USA and Canada, you can search using the Psychology Today listings (search for ‘infertility’ therapists even if you are not infertile/never had treatments as they may well have experience of working with the grief of childlessness – be sure to ask them!)
- If you are feeling in deep despair about your childlessness, I really recommend contacting The Samaritans if you are in the UK. YOU DON’T NEED TO BE FEELING SUICIDAL TO CALL THEM. They have a 24-hour number 08457 90 90 90. Sometimes the feelings of grief and hopelessness that childlessness can bring up can be very deep and talking to someone can really help. The middle of the night, weekends, Christmas and other holidays can be an especially tough time for childlessness so please don’t feel you’re being melodramatic…
Please let us know in the comments below if you know of any other resources in this area that we might include.