Reignite Weekend (Nottingham) Saturday 12th & Sunday 13th May 2018

FACILITATED BY LICENCED GW SISTER: CATHY VIVIAN
£295 Earlybird before 24th March // £350 after 24th March // Book with a £125 deposit

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There is life after childlessness, despite what the media, your friends, your mother and your inner bitch would have you believe! A meaningful and fulfilling life that makes sense to you because you custom-made it for yourself.

This Gateway Women Reignite Weekend is for you if you’re:

  • A woman who wanted to have children but it didn’t work out for any reason: infertility, didn’t meet partner, partner didn’t want (more) children, chronic illness, badly timed breakup, etc, etc… There are so many ways this can happen…
  • Struggling with relationships with friends and family as ‘the odd one out’
  • Wondering where your mojo went and where the hell to start looking for it!
  • Lonely and confused about your place in society when all you can see around you are mothers and families…
  • Knowing that you need to make some changes to your life but feeling too tired, sad & uninspired to know what to try next…
  • Worried about growing old without children…
  • Furious that you ‘did all the right things’ and have ‘ended up’ like this!

Portrait of Cathy VivianThis Reignite Weekend is led by Cathy Vivian, who has been trained personally by Jody Day, the Founder of Gateway Women.

Cathy is 54 and lives in Hinkley, Leicestershire with her husband and cat. Childless herself due to long term singleness and a chronic health condition during her last fertile years, Cathy attended her first Reignite Weekend with Jody in London in 2015 and has since been become a very active member of Gateway Women, both on and offline. She is involved in several local Gateway Women meetup groups in her area, and provided logistical and admin support for the first UK NOMO Conference that took place in October 2016. After chronic health issues led to early retirement from her business life, Cathy retrained as a Bowen Technique practitioner and uses this, and other modalities, to support those in chronic pain. In 2017, Cathy trained with Jody to become licensed as a ‘GW Sister’ to help spread the life-changing healing & sisterhood of the Reignite Weekend further afield.

As Cathy writes: Joining Gateway Women has been a truly wonderful and life-affirming experience for me. I feel I have a safe place to be now, with many other women there who can understand my story. I have no doubt that many of the friendships I have made are for life and will sustain me. The Reignite Weekend has been a founding part of helping me heal the grief of childlessness and I am so looking forward to sharing this experience with you. cathy@gateway-women.com 

Over the course of the Reignite Weekend you will:

  • Unpick the assumptions that the culture has about motherhood (and non-motherhood) and let go of what doesn’t ‘fit’ you.
  • Look at where you are holding onto unhelpful ideas and shame about the the life choices you’ve made (and the non-choices too) which have led you to ‘ending up’ without the family you hoped for.
  • Explore and express unresolved grief about your childlessness; grief which our culture neither acknowledges, understands nor allows (and consequently neither do we, sometimes).
  • Reexamine the dreams and goals you had for your life before you became convinced that having a baby was  the only thing that mattered.
  • Reignite your passion for your life, and and start thinking what your ‘Plan B’ might be for a meaningful and fulfilling life without children.
  • Meet your new tribe – the wonderful, powerful, wise and funny Nomos (not-mothers). There are more of us than you realise and we’re not the bunch of ‘weeping weirdoes’ you might fear! In fact, we’re a pretty amazing and courageous bunch of women…
A private room at the Hilton DoubleTree Nottingham 'Gateway' Hotel will be our workshop venue
A private room at the Hilton DoubleTree Nottingham ‘Gateway’ Hotel will be our workshop venue

After the workshop and into the future

The bonds that are made during the Reignite Weekend are very special and most women wish to take those friendships forward as they integrate the learning and healing from the weekend into their daily lives. As many of us have experienced, one of the unexpected and unsettling side effects of unchosen childlessness is that we may lose the easy connection we once had with a large part of our peer group as our friends move to a country called ‘motherhood’ where we can’t follow and will never fully speak the language. Having new Nomo (not-mother) friends to plug the gap can make coping with our situation not only more tolerable, but actually fun again! It also makes it easier to keep our friendships going with our ‘mum friends’ because we’re not so bent out of shape with a combination of resentment, jealousy and boredom around them…  As the weekend draws to a close, we will facilitate ways to organise ongoing contact with each other, should you wish that.

Reignite Weekend NOTTINGHAM

More details and to book

  • When: Saturday 12th & Sunday 13th May 2018
  • Times: 9.30am – 5pm
  • Cost: £295 Earlybird (by 24th March), £350 full price after. Places bookable with a non refundable £125 deposit. All balances due on/before 7th April. Once you have reserved your place, Cathy will be in touch to arrange your payment method – either PayPal or direct bank transfer. If you wish to contact Cathy about payment methods please email her directly at cathy@gateway-women.com
  • Lunch & Breaks: On Saturday we take a one hour break for lunch. The Topaz bar offers sandwiches, paninis and small plates, plus tea and coffee. On Sunday, if you wish, we can all have lunch together at a nearby pub, although you can opt of this if you wish. We’ll also take
    a morning and afternoon break of 15 minutes. Water will be provided in the room.
  • Directions & Parking:  The hotel is situated on the A610, 3 miles from Nottingham City Centre, 1 mile from Junction 26 of the M1 motorway. It is 15 minutes from the East Midlands Airport. For satellite navigation the postcode is NG8 6AZ. There is plentiful parking on site.
  • Accommodation: There are many options nearby. The hotel has very nice rooms from £66. There is a Premier Inn very nearby (£67), Rufford Court B&B (£40), Tudor Lodge Hotel a little further away (£70). Airbnb shows many good cheaper options from £20 upwards so it is worth checking this first.
  • Disabled Access: The venue is fully accessible for wheelchairs.  For any specific access questions, please contact cathy@gateway-women.com
  • How Many Women: In order to create an intimate and safe atmosphere, the workshop is restricted to 12 women only.
  • Who is the Reignite Weekend for? Women of any age, partnered or solo, who wanted to have children and for some reason, it didn’t work out. If you’re keen to move forward and create a meaningful and fulfilling life without biological children, it’s for you.
  • What is the cancellation policy? Your £125 deposit is non refundable.  If you cancel prior to 24th March you may request a refund of any payments made (minus your deposit). After that date, we can only refund your payments (minus your deposit) if we can resell your spot.

Some testimonials from women who’ve attended a Reignite Weekend with Cathy Vivian:

I could never have imagined what a meaningful, spiritual and helpful weekend was waiting for me. Having the opportunity to meet you and the other wonderful women was such a gift. You have great skill and natural gentleness which helped us all let down our guard and be vulnerable together. It really was an experience which will stay with me forever. (Karina, 40)

I was sick with nerves when I took that step to join and in the run up to the weekend I felt so scared I nearly didn’t make it. My fear of putting it all out there, of laying bare my heartache was really tough to do. But the returns were and are so worth it. I was so surprised how quickly you made me and us feel comfortable and all the positive feelings we were able to feel too. Thank you. (Tayla, 48)

I got more out of the Reignite Weekend than I could have hoped for. It was emotionally challenging at times but equally inspirational. To fully share my story with other women who not only understood, but listened and empathised as I did with their stories was really special. To realise it’s not just me that’s scared of everything, that it’s not just me who feels so lost and isolated was incredibly comforting. Cathy naturally created a safe, calm space with a welcoming energy where I think we all felt able to share, quite openly, our thoughts and feelings. The range of activities and the pace of the weekend was perfect. Plenty of time to reflect and I loved getting to be creative on the Sunday and realised how much I’d missed that in my life. It was a lot of money for me to spend as I’ve been out of work but definitely worth every penny and the progress I’ve made personally in just a week feels miraculous. Loving being part of our tribe and feeling excited about my future again. (Jill, 34)

When the weekend came up I was initially really keen but then I got cold feet because I worried about upsetting women who could not have children when I had terminated mine. It was you that got me over that seemingly huge hurdle – you were so accepting and understanding and told me about Jody’s similar experience. You were not pushy at all which I really appreciated. Like a frightened animal I felt reassured I could come out of my little self-made cave. Attending the weekend has changed my life. Internally and externally I feel connected again. My understanding of childlessness before the weekend was poor I now realise, but nobody was explaining it. I realise I had my own dodgy conceptions of childless women too. Now I am accepting and oddly, sometimes proud of my situation! There were times before when I didn’t see the point of me – though I did not feel this all the time before I discovered Gateway Women I felt it more than I care to remember. And now it’s just gone. Transformed into something else. (Maggie, 51)

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